Emotions of Choosing an Egg Donor

FAIRFAX EGGBANK, December 20, 2017

Written by Lisa Schuman, LCSW, a seasoned mental health professional who leads The Center for Family Building. Join her virtually in her monthly support webinar, aimed to address issues specific to third party reproduction including disclosure, development, and parenting. Learn more about her webinar here

So you want to find an egg donor who possesses qualities you see in yourself or perhaps even better?  That makes sense. Angelina Jolie adopted before she had a genetically related child, but most people choose to have genetically related children first. It’s natural to want children who will be connected to you and the people you love.

If you are a same-sex couple, a heterosexual couple with infertility, or someone who has suffered with an illness and genetic parenthood is no longer an option, it’s reasonable to feel sad about not being able to conceive with your own eggs and genetics.  This idea upsets some people more than others.  If you are able to seamlessly make this decision you are fortunate, but for most, the concept is difficult to fully digest and may affect the way you choose an egg donor.

When individuals and couples look at a picture of an egg donor it’s common to hear, “he looks like me when I was little” or “I was also athletic when I was a child.”  It’s also natural to want to replace yourself or choose characteristics you wish you possessed. With this in mind, it’s understandable why so many people look for a donor with the perfect SAT scores or who has movie star looks. READ FULL ARTICLE